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June 4, 1999

One man's meal has become another man's menace.

Go visit Key West, Fla., and see the melees on the streets. The town is not infested with teen-aged gangs causing trouble. Instead, chickens decorate the roads like I-74 construction cones.

The Associated Press reported the problem, according to one local, is that the chickens "are meaner than anything." The local law allows no chicken harassment. Some residents throw ice cubes at the birds because the cubes melt, unlike rocks or javelins.

June 1, 1999

Some people eat peanut butter sandwiches without the jelly. Others think Cher was better without Sonny.

But "The Jerry Springer Show" without fights? Could that be possible?

May 24, 1999

"Star Wars" has been in theaters for two days now. Is anyone still counting? Die-hard fans have probably already memorized the movie and are currently petitioning for title roles in the next installment.

The rest of us, "Star Wars" fans or not, have moved on with our lives. The movie was good, the special effects and sound were excellent, but there are other things to do, like clean the bathroom or raise porcupines.

May 18, 1999

Fold out a brown cardboard box.

Add five strips of tape - three long ways, two short ways - to the bottom.

Stack a layer of canned goods, maybe some baby food and toiletries, followed by a layer of clothes or towels or another random packing item.

Seal the box with five more pieces of tape, load it and be ready for another.

Crawfordsville residents weren't moving, but they were following a recipe for others who were. No one really knew who they were helping, but the cars of goods rarely stopped last weekend at the Hoosiers Helping the Heartland drive.

May 7, 1999

Most people probably think Crock-Pots, stoneware slow cookers, are about as interesting as clothes hangers. They take up space, are decorated with small vegetable pictures and stand out like a drunk at a frat party.

But the real question concerning the cookware is — how come everything you put in a Crock-Pot always tastes like ... a Crock-Pot?

From the Archive

March 8, 2007

If you're having problems with animals listening to you (Aqua Man, no need to apply), you may want to check out some of the research Chinese scientists have been compiling recently. There are reports that the Robot Engineering Technology Research Center of east China's Shandong University of Science and Technology is implanting micro electrodes in pigeons to control their movements.

July 11, 2004

I'm really, really getting frustrated by the advice Dear Abby hands out to people on a daily basis. Millions of people read this, and many times, what she has to say is incorrect!

April 17, 2009

I agree with Erin that the Faber College discussion has been interesting, to say the least. In a lot of ways, it reminds of how some things get "accomplished" at work. With so many individuals attempting to offer opinions on things, it's extremely difficult to put a reasonable plan in motion. I understand this is an open forum, and the talking heads for each group will come up with a more organized game plan. Students, faculty, and administrators are all making insightful comments.

October 9, 2000

"Believe it or not, I'd rather clean a bathroom than watch a football game."
-- whatever man said this would probably prefer to remain anonymous

I'll give you three guesses to determine where I found this quote. No, not the bakery. No, not the thesaurus. Yes, an online dating service!

July 31, 2000

If you're like me, you could use a big bowl of ice cream about now, and you are tired of hearing dot-com this and dot-com that. Soon, you won'tn be hearing this crap anymore. Instead, it might be dot-crap.

The International Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers (ICANN) has decided to expand the current list of top-level domains -- http://www.thestandard.com/article/display/0,1151,16268,00.html?nl=int