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There's nothing worse than people complaining about a product because it works too well.
For instance, there's glue. Try using that stuff that holds elephants from a trapeze by their teeth. If you accidentally glue the elephant's ear to the swing, the immobile animal will be stuck forever.
Another example is plastic wrap. You try to wrap something in it, but the stuff just clings together. Being persistent, you try to unwrap it. But the static forces that bind the universe won't allow a simple tug to do the trick.
One big disadvantage working at night is the television quality when I arrive home. Sometimes there could be a "Perfect Strangers" rerun or two, and possibly an old game show, but most channels are overrun by infomercials.
Webster defines an infomercial as "a long television commercial, often made to resemble a talk show, educational demonstration, interview, etc." Kudos to Webster's assessment. The only words missing from the definition are "trash," "ridiculous" and "cheap."
There are a plenty of new careers and opportunities these days, yet you rarely see anyone entering the piracy field. Some people have invented their own versions of a shipwrecked pirate - stealing stereos, hacking into computer files, playing baseball in Pittsburgh - but few take their chances on the high seas.
On the other hand, the Assocated Press said pirates killed more people in 1998 than the year before. The International Maritime Bureau reported Malaysian pirates, who killed 67 crewmen last year, are "getting increasingly violent."
Easter has come and gone like a gypsy caravan once again, but one thing still remains â€” Easter candy. Checking expiration dates on bags and containers, 1999 Easter candy should last until 2450. People decide to buy candy following the holiday in hopes of big bargains.
A specific type of candy has intrigued many and plagued worldwide analysists with a simple question, "What is a Peep?"
Today we will discuss a simple mathematical equation.
Baseball = Life
On the surface, it's a pretty simple equation. But it can be expanded to read the following: stitches/323(Yankees) * Concession stands^3+tickets - 37(fungoes) = Life
From the Archive
The Book Escape in Federal Hill is now carrying Corporate Ties. I just noticed online that this store is selling a copy of The Developers for $5. That's a great deal (although I won't get a penny if someone purchases it).
I'm sitting in my cube right now, wearing shorts, a T-shirt and tennis shoes. On the other side of the sensibility coin, analyst firm Gartner is predicting that avatars will have business dress codes by 2013. How do people come up with this stuff?
In general, I'm not a huge fan of inspirational books. I think that people have become enamored with novels like these because they need motivation to make something out of their lives. But, more times than not, once they've put the book away, they revert back to their usual lives and don't make any changes. Not only that, but many inspirational books are too shallow and bland to reach the surface of giving people hope.
While it's easy to find numerous things wrong while surfing the Web today (popup ads, no consistency between how browsers work, a lack of sites devoted to applesauce), there's one man who has a right to throw in his qualms.
This man is Sir Tim Berners-Lee, the inventor of the World Wide Web (trumpets should sound now, so turn up your speakers). From the Wikipedia, he is also the director of the World Wide Web Consortium, which oversees its continued development.
I'm taking a little vacation this weekend, but I won't be stopping the book tour just yet. I'll be at the Barnes & Noble in Baltimore's Inner Harbor 3-5 p.m. Sept. 1 for a little book signing and discussion about "The Developers."
I was going to be in the area because I'm going up there to see my beautiful girlfriend. So I figured, well, I might as well try to sell some books while she's finishing up with her kindergarten class for the day.