Just in case you have forgotten, Sept. 19 is a special day. Yes, it's that day each year when you are allowed to talk like a pirate, and be thanked for doing so.
International Talk Like a Pirate Day is here ... don't waste it by not wearing your eye patch! If you need help in learning to how to speak properly, please watch this video ... it's really all that you will need to get through the day.
If you are trying to make this a romantic Talk Like a Pirate Day, I give you permission to use the following poem I wrote a few years ago for another column:
Me beauty (insert name of significant other),
There's a great tale spinnin' o'er our ship that you's a true sea-farin' lass.
And when me hearties told me the news, I could say only avast!
Oh, a true jack finds piles of scallywags among landlubbers both near and far,
But rarely he lay his deadlights on a creature that glistens like the northern star;
I'd turn over me booty smartly to hear from yer sweet voice a chantey or two;
The melody would perhaps make a stern swashbuckler turn into slimy stew.
So now, me love,
What will it be?
Marooned on the land,
Or in the water and free?
Yer choices are endless,
So walk the plank with me.