Relax and have some cookies

I was talking to your computer the other day, and he said you were a little perturbed. He said you didn't appreciate me or anyone else, especially NATO officials, being able to find all kinds of information on you. Wasn't the Computer Age founded on simple things, like privacy and freedom to practice whatever mathematical calculations you wish?

Dippin (for new) dots

If you're like me, you could use a big bowl of ice cream about now, and you are tired of hearing dot-com this and dot-com that. Soon, you won'tn be hearing this crap anymore. Instead, it might be dot-crap.

The International Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers (ICANN) has decided to expand the current list of top-level domains --,1151,16268,00.html?nl=int

ILOVEYOU -- here are eight million e-mails

Maybe I'm in a small minority, but I'm still confused how so many people are duped every so often by an e-mail virus. Let's take this step by step:

A guy walks into his workspace at 7:30 a.m., preparing for another exciting day of whatever. He opens his inbox to find 50 e-mails -- 45 promising him to lose weight, financial freedom or cheap Viagra four from actual friends, probably chain letters and one other with a subject header of "Open repeatedly, this is not a virus," which of course is from

Honey, I made a homepage

You cannot escape the Internet. OK, you're right, you can. You can move to Uruguay. But for all the trouble, you might as well find a computer and get busy.

A lot of people have been talking about designing a "homepage," which has nothing to do with your living quarters. Simply put, a homepage is the portal to the most important information on a particular Web site.

Your computer isn't just a fancy paperweight

Computers can be your friends. No, they won't take you to lunch or buy you a drink. But they can do more than collect dust. Assuming you are human (and if not, don't let that stop you from reading), you probably fit into one of four categories:

1. You still use a typewriter, you're still building a bomb shelter, and your best friend in grade school was Robert "Robbie" E. Lee.


Random News

What the pretty girl did with my business card


"Did that guy REALLY think I would call or email him?" she says to her friend. "What do you think I should do with this?"

"There are a lot of things you could do with a business card," the friend says, grabbing the card from her left hand and holding it up to the light. "You could turn it into a coaster. You could make an airplane out of it, although it would be a tiny airplane. You could even write a something on the back of it."

The friend pulls out an ink pen and tries desperately to scribble "FREAK" on the back of it.

The results are in: Bush, Gore lose to The Golf Channel

I have one simple request for Christmas -- that someone, ANYONE, will finally be named president. Yes, we have George W. and Al, but if they name Al W. George out of Minot, N.D., instead, that would be fine.

What caused this whole problem? The people of the United States, of course, always trying to stir up trouble, whether it's at the local moose lodge or bingo hall. Can't people fill in the correct circles? Can't people count votes right? Can't people use turning signals when changing lanes?

Plagarism wasn't just invented yesterday

I thought about writing an article about plagarism, then I decided I would first see if I could copy it from someone else.

HA! That was supposed to be funny ... or maybe just sad.

There is a recent report from the BBC saying that the Internet has made copying sources easier. Furthermore, the professor quoted in the story says that the new generation of students see nothing wrong with copying material found online.

Internet popup ads taking over

Hopefully by accessing this page, your screen hasn't been barraged by Internet popup ads. Many sites have popups that supposedly give you free gift certificates or allow you to download spyware or some other random thing. First, do people intentionally click on these things? And secondly, does their computer explode when they do?

MySpace agrees to take precautions against Decepticons

It's easy to blame a computer or program or even a social networking site for all the evils in the world. In fact, the last time I yelled at my computer, and told it to stop screwing up, you know how it replied?

It just sat there and did nothing. Yep, that's the obvious sign of a guilty party.


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