As I agonize about writing this opening paragraph,
I wonder what type of people read this column. I mean,
are they reading this while they chew gum with their
mouths wide open, are they chewing their toenails or,
worse yet, are they putting gum between their toes?
OK, I really wasn't thinking about that, I was wondering
how much Dr Pepper I could drink. But this brings up
a good point about etiquette. I guess if you were home
alone, you could put gum anywhere you like, as long
as you have a jar of peanut butter handy. But in the
real world, and on the computer, it helps to have some
etiquette skills.
If you use a public computer, there are a few simple
steps you should take each time you sit (or stand, if
you are shorter than a printer table) so other people
in the computer lab won't think you are armed with Krazy
Glue.
• You should be at a terminal by yourself. If
you are working on a group project or you just want
to show your friends the
Texas Department of Criminal Justice's list of final
meal requests, that's fine, as long as you don't
stay there for three weeks.
• Never turn your music or sound up so high that
a person three labs down thinks there's a party and
orders pizza. The person might not realize you don't
like sausage!
• You can be louder than in a library when discussing
work with others, but don't be as loud as you would
be at a baseball game. That is, unless someone is walking
around the office selling Cracker Jacks.
• There should be no food and drink around the
computer. I say this as I take a sip of my Dr Pepper.
If you are allowed to bring that sort of stuff into
the lab, make sure your hands are clean when typing
and using the mouse. You aren't doing the next guy a
favor by leaving him half of a pepperoni.
• If you are logged in, you should log out before
you leave. The area should be left exactly the way it
was before you got there. Leave a tip for the Cracker
Jack vendor if necessary.
If you aren't using a public computer, there are still
plenty of etiquette rules by which to abide. I found
a slew of sites pertaining to everything from e-mail
flaming to online wedding registries. The best summary
of these rules can be found under Netiquette
Guidelines, but you may also want to check out the
listings for Computers: Internet: Etiquette for
even more links. Of course, to expediate things, I've
condensed the rules to a few simple points so even gum
in your toes won't slow you down.
• Never send chain letters. First of all, I've
seen every chain letter. Hasn't everyone? Why do people
still send them? YOU WON'T BE STRUCK BY LIGHTNING IF
YOU DON'T SEND ONE!
• Do not type in all caps because it looks as if
you are yelling at someone. For instance, I was yelling
at my computer about sending chain letters and yelling
for the Frosty Malt vendor, who is scanning photos right
now.
• When sending a reply, check your mail to make
sure it is going to the appropriate correspondents.
Only perform a Reply All if you really want to reply
to all 65,403 people who just received a chain letter
from your supposedly best friend.
• Use emoticons only when necessary. Some examples
are a smiley face :) and a frowny face :( . I've also
devised a few new ones: |\\\\\\| (a bookshelf), ={)
(a rabbit with a moustache) and 8-)}= (Richard Simmons).
• When chatting with someone online, you should
always say goodbye in some form. Because people's connection
speeds are different, you never know when the person
has left or just doesn't want to talk to you. Sending
the person the Richard Simmons emoticon is also an adequate
way of saying goodbye.
These tips should suffice for now. Visit those links
for a more in-depth look at etiquette on the Internet.
I've got to get back to work, crank the music up and
finish my Dr Pepper.
Comments